Friday, August 27, 2010

Friday Focus

Nearing the 2nd anniversary of this blog, so 24 months in and I'm only on my 6th post (not counting the 4 drafts that have still not been completed)... nope I don't procrastinate. That works out to one post every 8 months, oh dear.

So I made this great plan back in January to re-focus and get my life in order and I got pretty much nowhere with it. I won't get into my emotional state or the busy summer I've had but just jump in where I'm at on this. School starts in a mere 6 days and I'm far from ready. I also want and need to make my home my "job" during the day for the next couple of months so we can have a comfortable and welcoming place to be through the coming winter months. I'd really like to try to go back to work as well. So... where to start?

I think I need to start by spending quality time each day with my boys, not just a movie and before I get sucked into the big bad net. They only have one actual day of school next week so starting tomorrow morning we will do something together, play a game, play Lego, or go geocaching. I also have to remember that once I am on the computer I still need to pay complete attention to them when they need my help or to just tell me about what they are building or creating. I'll need help with that, so on Monday I will call my doctor to have my Ritalin Rx renewed or to try something else (takes about 3 weeks to get into my doctor so I'll need to be patient on that one). Either way I need help to be able to focus where it matters most and with ADHD it's far easier to hyper focus on the computer than to pay attention to the boys or heed the call of the duties of the domestic Goddess.

I also need to get back to my workouts, I feel better, I'm more energised, I was actually losing weight, a lot of it and I sleep better too. But one step at a time, if I bite off more than I can chew I'll overwhelm myself as I so often end up doing. So we'll start with the quality time with the boys and finding some routine in preparation for the coming school year.

Feeling a need to find some order and routine in your life without getting bored? Feel free to message or leave a comment and perhaps we can encourage each other.


Judged...

Warning: long post!

I have been catching up with some blog posts by the woman that inspired me to start my own blog, Dawn Meehan. I was shocked and dismayed to find out she’d recently finalised her divorce. It has been so long since I’ve read hers, or anyone’s blog, that I had no idea she even had marital problems, let alone that it had gone that far. As I read her posts and about how she is not just accepting but moving forward, Dawn continues to inspire me by her amazing character and strength as a woman and now a single mom. In searching for more information, I came across this blog post on judging others from 2008 and although I understand the original context in what she wrote is different from my situation, I believe the message is universally applicable.


Let me explain…

Recently I found myself drowning in judgement from a friend I thought would always understand me, a friend I’d always thought of as a sister. After months of silence from her, I wrote an email asking what I had done that she seemed to be so upset with me, upset enough that even when I spent a few days in hospital in April she really didn’t seem to give a crap. The reply I received from her felt like someone had taken a knife and stabbed me in the heart.


Engaging in a short email conversation via fb, I received replies that had accusations that felt judgemental, accusatory and essentially indicative that because I was struggling in my Christian walk and faith (perhaps one day I will feel ready to write about this) that I was no longer “good enough” to be acknowledged. I read her words and found myself feeling that if I “get my shit together” (my words) I will then be acceptable to spend time with??? Did she bother to ask me what was going on? Not at all. Did she take time to learn that I spent a lot of time keeping my mouth shut around her and not sharing some things because I didn’t want to worry or upset her? No, instead I was accused of not thinking of her at all, that I didn’t take time to stop, whilst in my own personal hell, to see how my actions were affecting her life. What??? Other comments in her emails indicated that she had the idea that my faith struggles were based on some whim, that I “decided” God no longer fit my lifestyle so perhaps it was better He didn’t exist. That I traded in God for activities, the internet and men (I’ve dated one guy in the past year, what a ‘ho I am ! And heaven forbid I not spend every spare moment in or near a church or listening to sermons). Not once, to anyone, did I ever say God doesn’t exist. I cannot now, or ever, deny His existence, I’ve seen too much and experienced too much and felt too much to not believe. It wasn’t about not believing, it was far bigger than that but when I tried to explain to the one person I thought would understand I got pushed away and I didn’t hear from her for months until I sent that fateful email a few weeks ago.


Hurt, angry, confused and in tears I retaliated with accusations of hypocrisy and other words that I knew would hurt. Yet I still kept back most of what I really wanted to say as I still had hope that our friendship was salvageable. I tried to start an explanation of why I was in the place I was AND that I was actually working my way out of that black place (with the help of extremely supportive and non-judgemental friends). Her reply indicated that she had no idea I had been struggling (yet I know I had tried to explain months earlier) and left me feeling she was not interested in hearing what I had to say, that all I said in explanation fell on deaf ears. Comments such as “I had to distance myself to protect my faith as you were taking me to a dark place” Huh? Then in complete contradiction of that saying, “had you talked to me about it I would have been there to help”?? Ummm, I TRIED and my email was deleted (apparently on fb now if you delete an email it’s gone from the sender’s box as well) and I didn’t hear from her until I initiated a new conversation months later. After writing an angry and hurt filled email which I never sent, I finally wrote that I saw no point in attempting to explain further or argue my side, as she appeared uninterested, to say the least, in listening to what I had to say. I got no reply to that email, just another deleted conversation. So where do I/we go from here?


I’ve struggled with this question for awhile now as her friendship, her complete understanding of me, the things we shared, meant everything to me, beyond the popular term of bff she was the sister of my heart. The person I thought I knew, the one single individual I thought would tell me anything without fear, and I her, has become a stranger. There were indications over the past couple of years that there were changes I wasn’t crazy about, maybe I changed and it’s not her? But 18 years of friendship are essentially down the drain. She was the one person I could go to and tell ANYTHING to, she knows things about me that very very few people know. It’ll take me time to trust anyone again the way I trusted her after feeling trampled over and abandoned. I was accused of not thinking of her when she has no idea what I was thinking, that I should know better and that my life choices were unacceptable. Essentially I felt that because I am not a perfect Christian, that I have moments where I have struggled in my faith, then I have to “get better” before I’m “good enough” to receive her friendship. This is where I am left feeling, if it was intended or not, this is the message I picked up.


For the most part it’s been a busy summer and I’ve kept this on the backburner. My faith is renewing, I have amazing friends both online and in person that stand by me and I by them. I’ve been spending time in a fun activity that keeps me and the boys off the computer and outside playing. Until I read Dawn’s blog I could keep my hurt hidden, I could avoid deciding how to react, then these words popped out at me from that post…

Matthew 7
1"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.
3"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.”

"It's easy to judge someone else and decide that they're incompetent when things are going well for you... A look (or word) that says - I understand; I'm sorry you're having a tough time, it’s ok.

I'm telling you, don't judge others. Let your words and actions be a blessing to them.

Even if you think you know all about the other person or the situation, you don't. Not until you've walked a mile in their shoes, can you truly understand.”
~Dawn Meehan

This is EXACTLY how I felt after our fb email conversation. It’s easy to sit in your Ivory Tower, with no financial struggles, no unpredictable disability, confident in the love of your husband and in a “holier than thou” voice point fingers at those that struggle in their day to day life, alone, financially struggling, debilitating disabilities and feeling unloved. I don’t pretend to understand where my “friend” is at in her world, from my side I see something akin to a perfect life and although slightly envious, I’m also very happy for her and proud of her. What I see, and I don’t think she does, is that it’s far easier to keep a strong faith when you’re life is going well, it’s much harder when your life feels like it’s falling apart. I hope, should I ever have the blessings of a much “easier” life, that I never forget the struggles that brought me there and that I never hand out judgements as if I’m better than the person I am pointing at. No matter where I am in life, I am no better or worse than the majority of those I share this world with.


The more I think about things that have been said and actions that have been observed or lack of action, the more I realise we are no longer as similar as we once were. As I look at these things and the differences I see in the two of us that were never there before, the more I realise that the season of this friendship is over. I don’t understand. I have tried, I have struggled, it just doesn’t make sense to me but there it is and I can’t abide intolerance of the frailty of the human condition, physical, mental, spiritual and emotional, none of us are infallible. I am not perfect, I never will be, and as the beautiful Norma Jean Baker once said, “If you can’t handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best”. I will stand by my friends through all their trials and triumphs, give praise and hugs when their lives are going great, be a shoulder to cry on and pray for them when times are tough, but I will not put up with being made to feel like I’m unworthy unless I subscribe to anything other than who I am.

“A real friend is someone that knows all about you, but loves you just the same.” ~E. Hubbard

“He who does not understand your silence will probably not understand your words.” ~E. Hubbard

May the Lord Bless You and Keep You…

~Shannon.xo


Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Best laid plans......

During a twitter conversation Thursday morning with a friend, I mentioned that things rarely go according to plan so I usually attempt to “go with the flow” in my day-to-day life. As with most important lessons in life, I’ve learned this very one the hard way. Having fibromyalgia (FMS) and chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS) there have been far more occasions than I care to count where I have made plans and promises to do something, and ended up laid out flat; Barely capable of dressing & making my boys pb&j’s for supper, let alone attempting to follow through on plans. Becoming adaptable, and hopefully teaching my children the need to be adaptable, has become something of an art form for me, this past Thursday being another example.

Weather in our area has been less than stellar this spring, with it snowing up to the last weekend in May, many plans have had to either be set aside or permanently squashed. The school track & field day was originally May 28th, then postponed until June r3rd due to said snow, only to wake that morning to dull grey skies, temperatures barely moving into the double digits in Celsius and a light drizzle. Lovely.

They did go ahead with the track meet but as the rain turned to a steady downpour and temperatures dropped I realised that I could not be there in the afternoon to watch as I had assured my children I would. Standing outside in cold, very wet, weather would have left me incapable of doing much for the remainder of the weekend, leaving any further plans I may have in the dust so to speak. I feel terrible, I always do, even though I know I have to make these choices. Sometimes it’s worth the pain and sometimes, quite frankly, it’s just not. I tried to make it up to them, we got takeout from town, picked up the newly released “Alice in Wonderland” blu-ray, some movie junk food and had a nice family movie night. Maybe this weekend, weather permitting, we’ll work our way to the city geocaching and/or a trip to the zoo. It won’t bring back the memories of their last track meet with his school, but it’ll help, hopefully, ease their frustrations with Mum’s limitations.

Aspects of adaptability in the face of FMS:

· Rarely make promises beyond promising to do your best to be there or complete a task.

· Deadlines best be set, at minimum, to double the amount of time it takes others to complete the same project. Then add extra time on top of that.

· Lower your standards. I don’t mean to substandard levels, but perfection is rare at the best of times… for us, expecting such is counter-productive (I think many of us are often perfectionists, so this is easier said than done).

· Go easy on yourself. We may want to be like “normal” people, with “normal” energy levels, but we’re not “normal”… therefore….

· Just do your best!

No matter how much I plan, or decide I want to do, in the next day, next week, next month, or even within the next year, I have to include some a bit a LOT of room for adaptability and that some plans may never come to be. Acceptance, with gumption, is crucial to not just surviving but living a life where pain is our constant companion. Don’t give in, and never give up hope!

MAWOY!!

~Shannon *hugs*


Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Where's Shannon???

In all likelihood, no one really cares about this but I need to record it so I can get my head on straight (if that is even possible...lol). So what is Shannon up to these days? What is keeping me so busy that I rarely have time to blog, or at least complete a blog? (Grateful you cannot see my edit list and how many "drafts" are sitting therein.)

In some order resembling importance, but not necessarily in order of actual time spent ;) :

  • Parenting: Two very active boys of 7 & 9, 'nuff said?
  • Household: see previous point, attempting some resemblance of keeping order.
  • School: Attempting to get caught up after a very slow start to my University career
  • Photography: Always been an interest, a friend recently dumped fuel on the embers and this is growing back into the passion that has been dormant for far too long. (Also, I can't paint, so this is the next best thing ;) )
  • Internet: I spend far too much time researching and chatting and browsing about what I should be doing. That being said, I've made some pretty great friends and really loving how small the world is via the world wide web.
  • Writing: Another passion, but one I spend far too little time on.

So that's about it, and yet, it seems to consume my day quite well and finds me quickly at the end of the day wondering, "now what the heck did I do today???" Next, creating a routine to try to fit in as much of each of these as possible as well as some down time. Until next time, May Angels Watch Over You (MAWOY)!

What's keeping you busy these days? I would love to hear from you :)

~Shannon

ps. I think this may win as my shortest blog ever (not counting Wordless Wednesday) ;)

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

twitter or facebook........

Once again I'm inspired by another blogger. This one comes from Soshable | Social Media Blog.

Woohoo, another debate. I love a good debate, the tension, the face off, the sweat, oh sorry, that's the hockey game between Canada & Russia tonight at the Vancouver 2010 Winter Olympics ▌♥ ▌ Go Canada Go ▌♥ ▌ (sorry, shameless plug there). There is something about debates though, especially on hot topics, that give me an adrenaline rush and gets the creative juices flowing. I really enjoy pushing extolling sharing my opinions on current, and even not so current, topics of interest. So, without further adieu, I will now climb upon my proverbial soapbox.

Twitter and facebook, currently two of the most well known social media sites on the internet. There are others, as we well know. Facebook whoops MySpace's proverbial butt (yes I know there are still a lot of users on MySpace, but it's not for me), I barely skipped a beat when I switched over and I haven't looked back, I can't even recall when I was last on my own MySpace account. There is LinkedIn, personally, not sure if I know anyone on that and have no idea what it is, and now Google has the new kid on the block, Buzz. I have a total of ONE contact on Buzz so far, and a lovely contact she is. Numbers are one thing, they don't lie, but they can be misleading, personally, when I meet someone knew these days (IRL), if we decide to exchange phone numbers, the next questions are, "do you have facebook?" and then, "do you tweet?". Let's face it folks, it's facebook and twitter that are the real contenders here.

I have only recently really started getting into tweeting, although I've had my twitter account since sometime last year. Currently I sit at 194 tweets, I'm following 60 people/accounts, I have 41 followers (wow!), and 2 of those have me listed (no, not that kind of list, a twitter list. If I ever decide I'm smart enough to have a technical blog, I'll be able to link to my own info. In the meantime, try bitrebels for an explanation.), 12 of my own lists and one list that I follow. I'm sure I could make an equation out of all that, not really my gig anymore though. What it does equal though is, comparatively speaking, I am still most definitely a newbie in the twitter world.

Facebook is another story altogether, I have 356 friends (sort of middle of the road there, and I'm good with that), far too many applications, which need to be culled, and several "fan" pages. I have been on facebook for, well, ummmm, awhile, 4 or 5 years? Point is, I am definitely NOT a facebook newbie.

So what does all this mean in view of the social network debate? In my world, comparing the two is rather an apples and oranges question. They are different in their own, and very distracting time-hogging useful ways. For me, they complement each other. Facebook is truly social media, it is about friendships, networking, and even dating. Over the past few years I have reconnected with some very wonderful old friends from my past. I'm not in the, "we lost touch for a reason" camp, I truly love getting to know the adult versions of my school buddies and family members. I also find it a wonderful way to keep up to date with those on my friend list, I am a people person, I like to know what's going on in your life; I'm curious because I care. I don't, however, play games on fb anymore, I rarely engage in sharing of apps, but that is something else you will find there that is not on twitter, and I'm glad it's not on twitter. Facebook is my apple, it's shiny, dense and has lots of fibre.

Twitter is my orange. I like both apples and oranges, but somehow I always feel like I'm getting more nutrition from an orange, I'm sure they are equal in their own rights, that's just my perception. For the most part I follow photographers, writers, bloggers, geeks and a few musicians. From their tweets, I am learning a plethora of information on my favourite and most passionate areas of interest. And all those areas roll up nice and neatly into my biggest passion, education (my vitamin c). I love to learn, if I don't understand or know something I look it up, if I feel like I am not getting the answer I want, I research and dig deeper. My tweeters (is that the right term? like I said, newbie), are quite often, doing a lot of the legwork for me and I am absorbing the most amazing information, from up & coming tech gadgets, to photo technics, to how to get blog traffic, to word of the day for my writing. Twitter has become my place to get information, to be informed, and to inform (well, still getting to that stage).

The long and short of it is, for my personal choice, I pick both. I can't pick one over the other. They each serve their purpose in my world. My ever expanding, right from my own living room, world. It's a good world, despite living in the middle of nowhere, I still feel connected.

Many people will walk in and out of your life,
But only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.

~Eleanor Roosevelt

Monday, February 22, 2010

Journaling: Handwritten in a book or Blog it.....

So here's my dilemma, I want to blog more, I have 4 blogs that rarely get entries these days. More importantly though, I really need to stop procrastinating my school work so that has to be TOP priority for me right now.

ROFL.... my kitten is sleeping on his back on the back of the couch (no that's not redundancy, that's what he's doing and where he is, really really). He's quite obviously dreaming, perhaps he is chasing the mouse he didn't catch (but I did :P) and his back feet are twitching. His toes are actually going to the beat of the current song (something by the Corrs) so it looks like he's tapping his toes to the tune. Darn it no video on my dSLR, but here's a cute picture of him snoozing.


Ok, ummmmm, gee, they say I have ADHD, they really don't understan.... oh look, a kitty dancing :P.

Anyway, as I was saying, ummmm oh yeah, school has to be my priority. Next assignment, start a writer's journal. Herein lies my dilemma, the suggested format is to get a blank notebook that suits you; It should be durable, portable, yet large enough to allow fluid writing. Ok, I love journals, scratch that, I love nearly all stationery, I'm a collector of stationery, I have more stationery than Staples spread around this place. Think I can find a journal here that I "feel" is suitable? Not likely, I'm funny that way, I could have 10 examples of what I need, but none are what I "want", they are not suitable to the purpose I have in mind.

That's not really my dilemma though, I need to go shopping really really soon anyway (like yesterday). The issue I'm working on is that I want to blog more but as I turn my focus to obtaining my degree I will continue to have little blog time. I wouldn't mind blogging my writer's journal, but a) it is supposed to be private and b) it is supposed to be portable. In considering these requirements, a) my public blogs won't work then. I can, set the entries to private, so that's an easy fix. B) My preferred location of entry is my desktop computer with the 24" monitor, not particularly portable. My HP Tablet is far more portable (not fit in my purse portable, but if I can haul around a dSLR all the time, what's one more backpack), but currently the wireless card is fubar so I can't post until I get home. Considering I spend 90% of my time at home, that doesn't sound very hard to do either. Seriously though, if you know me, once I want something, I have very little patience to wait for it. Nope, no ADHD here ;).

Having written all this out now I think I answered my own question, which is often the point of writing and/or sharing, particularly when faced with a conundrum. I'll purchase a new journal for the job. I really think that, although I'm not out & about often, grabbing a book to write in, rather than hauling out even a small laptop, is far less complicated. Having said that, if you have an opinion, feel free to share, I'm always open to new ideas ;).


Thursday, January 14, 2010

Be prepared... winter driving....

Be Prepared. This is a good motto that the Boy Scouts use and it has served them, and many others, well over the years. This would be a good motto for the fellow (and many other dimwitted dwellers of snowy regions) that arrived at my doorstep after I’d just crawled into bed Monday evening.

It wasn’t that late, not much past 10:00 PM, but I was tired after a crappy sleep the night before. Winding down for the night, I was sitting on my bed setting my new clock alarm when, Bailey, my neighbour’s dog, went berserk. Honestly, at first I didn’t pay much attention, she is, well, she’s sweet and as I am the one that feeds her (another story) she has kind of adopted us, but she barks at anything and everything. Birds, leaves fluttering, a reflection of light (this is quite amusing actually, gotta video her one of these days), so quite frankly, her barking doesn’t raise too many alarms, generally. When she continued, was very loud and aggressive sounding and did not stop without a break, I started to think something was up. Then my spidey senses startled tingling (really, only, I’ve never been bitten by a radioactive spider, at least not that I’m aware of).

I realised something was definitely up. Usually, she only goes crazy if a coyote is trying to get on the property, or a stranger drives up. I did not hear a vehicle so I just assumed it must be a coyote, until… someone knocked on my door. Living in the middle of nowhere almost generally affords the comfort level that if anyone is in this area, it is because they have to be, not because they are out for a random killing spree, so I usually feel pretty secure in my wee home. (I mean really, this IS Canada). Still, I wasn’t sure if I should open the door or not that night, I heard no vehicle come into the yard, I was tired, ergo more sensitive than usual, and not feeling particularly “neighbourly” at strangers on my doorstep.

But being the good citizen and worried it was a stranded traveller, I opened my door a crack to see what manner of person dared come knocking on a home that was obviously shut down for the night (only light on when he knocked was my bedside light). It didn’t occur to me until just now, that he likely saw that the lights were being shut off one by one in a row as I had only just gone to bed. Anyway, I digress. I opened the door, and the only creature on my deck was Bailey… wth? I know I heard a knock, then just beyond the deck I saw this fellow looking lost and quite nervous of that big black dog barking her head off. Now, I wear pj’s to bed, nice warm flannel ones, but I wasn’t terribly interested in showing at the door like that so I threw a hoodie on over top at least, so I assume the delay had caused him to think that no one was going to answer (not to mention the big black dog barking at him).

Apparently, this fellow, for whatever reason, felt a need to pullover whilst driving in the dark on a country road, thought he saw an approach and pulled in, realising, far too late obviously, that he had in fact pulled straight into a ditch. In the summer, no big deal, winter, in a car, not a good thing. Not just any winter either, this year, we have already had unbelievably copious amounts of snow. My deck was three feet deep, the ditches, deep ones, filled until they looked nearly flat, and the snow drifts in our yards against buildings and tree lines were six feet high. And if that’s not enough of a challenge for a fellow, obviously from the city in his wee car, it was melting at an unbelievably fast rate and everything was incredibly slick.

I could see the flashing lights from his vehicle, just under a mile up the road, so obviously most likely true, and he was asking if someone was available to help him push it out. Now, I live alone and have small children. I do share the acreage with the property owner’s grandson living in his own trailer just behind mine, he’s a good, big farm boy, but was away in the oil fields for his winter job at the time. Needless to say, it was not even remotely possible for me to leave my home, and therefore, not much help to a motorist in need. Honestly folks, I took a good look at this fellow, and he wasn’t much help to himself either I’m sure. Dressed right off the pages of a magazine, he had on his fancy shiny leather shoes, nice cuffed trousers and his leather ¾ length jacket. (I walk my boys to the bus each morning down our rather long driveway, next morning I realised it was sheer ice, I have no idea how that man managed to walk it and stay upright in those shoes). This was a fellow, who’s motto is most decidedly NOT, Be Prepared! He says to me, “I have a shovel”. Great! But now you’re pretty gucci’s are filled with snow dear. (I didn’t say that out loud, I’m much to polite lol). So he has a shovel, but is driving in the dead of winter, with only office wear and pretty shoes, I hope they’re durable.

In the end, best I could offer him was what was left of a box of clean litter for some traction. I tried phoning down to the farm, but he was not home either. I drove by the next morning, and saw where he had been stuck (my 4x4 would have been fine ;) ), and obviously, somehow gotten free. I have no idea if it was with the assistance of the litter, a passing motorist, or if he had to call a tow truck, but he made it out and presumably home safely (or whatever his destination).

Moral of the story: If you live in a climate where snowy weather is a factor, Be Prepared! In the winter, carry the following supplies with you in your trunk or cargo space at all times:

  • Roadside Assistance membership
  • Winter boots (or something that keeps snow out, your feet warm & dry and has a decent grip)
  • Warm toque (hat), gloves & scarf
  • Shovel (he had that at least)
  • A small box of cat litter or sand (great for traction)
  • Vehicle safety kit
  • ice scraper
  • snow brush
  • sand, salt or kitty litter
  • booster cables
  • flashlight
  • blanket
  • reflective warning sign or road flares
  • extra clothing
  • emergency food supplies
  • matches
  • candle in a deep tin
  • fire extinguisher
  • paper towels or rags
  • First-aid kit
  • compass
  • road map

Friday, January 8, 2010

Friday Focus

Focus: This is what this weekend is going to be about for me. I have things I want to accomplish, both inside (me) and outside (home) and I need to exist in a place of intention to accomplish my goals. During a teleconference today, one of the attendees mentioned focusing on only a maximum of 3 – 5 (5 pushing it) items in any given day, week, month or year and based on that sound advice I have these goals set for the weekend:

1. Keep up my daily FLYing (routines)

2. Focus on the tasks I want to complete & completing them (Better, not perfect!)

3. Take some genuine me time, pampering, meditating, journaling and making a habit of this.

4. Remembering my mantra, “New Year, New Decade, New Start”.

Although I am not expecting company, for this weekend, I am going to adapt FlyLady’s Crisis Cleaning as my MO. My intention is that our home is not only ready for company but to feel a sense of peace and belonging, and to show my boys and myself that we are worth it. Not just company deserves to see or home at our best, we do as well.

Working in 15-minute intervals I WILL get our house turned back into a home and I WILL find inner peace and balance. It is my plan to set my timer spending 15 minutes each working in three different areas, and then take a 15-minute break and reward myself with something I enjoy. This break may include colouring a Mandela, chatting with a friend, reading or just enjoying the beautiful view outside my window with a cup of tea.

My areas of focus for Friday will be the areas we see as we come into our home when we’ve been out and about, and on revising my Control Journal & routines. Saturday I will continue in those areas, and add our areas of rest as well. Saturday evening will be about focusing on pampering myself a bit. Sunday, time to renew my spirit and work on project completion. I will focus on making things better, not perfect.

By posting this on my blog, I am making myself accountable to anyone that dares read it, so please feel free to ask me how I’m doing.

My List of Accountability (To Do List):

1. Living areas

a. Entryway

b. Kitchen/Dining

c. Living room

2. Control Journal

a. My Routines (Daily/Weekly)

b. Boys Routines

3. Rest areas

a. Master bedroom

b. 7yo’s bedroom

c. 9yo’s bedroom

4. Self care

a. Colour my hair

b. Do my nails

c. Facial

d. Moisturize

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Day 9 at Wii Fitting!

(This is yesterday's information and posted first on wiifitroutine.com).

Burned: 2,239 cal (according to this )

Time: 9 hours

New Activities Tried: See below

higgledy-piggledy

-adverb

1.

in a jumbled, confused, or disorderly manner; helter-skelter.

This is the way my brain feels today and I know why, too much crap (can I say crap) going in and not enough going out. In other words, I ate horribly yesterday and not near enough water intake. The boys & I went Christmas and grocery shopping, breakfast was ok, one slice of toast with peanut butter, a cup of that lemon detox I linked to previously, and a cup of tea, then an apple enroute to the store (remind me next year that Walmart on a Saturday is bad enough, but the Saturday before Christmas is just stoooopid).

We left just before 11 AM and didn't get home until nearly 8 PM. (Any decent shopping is at least a 45 km(27 mi) drive and this city is 65 km(39 mi) away). We started at McDonald's, actually I grabbed a large double double coffee at Timmies first, and at McD's I only ordered a burger (double cheese), no fries. Then we shopped, and shopped, and shopped and finally left there at oh 2:30ish, hit Dollarama for another hour, got petrol and hit Superstore until 6:30ish. (Oh, I encouraged someone to purchase Wii Fit Plus at Walmart as a gift for her daughter-in-law :D). At Superstore my youngest (7 yo) decided to wander off and I had to get the store to call a "Code Adam" (can I count a panic attack as calories burned??). I'm so glad these big stores keep people at the exits at all times, he was discovered in less than 5 minutes but it felt like hours. I was so freaked out and in tears by the time he walked up with a store employee.

I was tired, stressed and just plain wiped out when we left Superstore, my feet and legs were burning we'd walked so much, at that point I decided I had earned a Starbucks coffee. Went to park at the new Starbucks and saw a Little Ceasars in the same strip, yay, supper! On the trip home, I drank half my coffee and ate 2 crazy bread and as if the shopping wasn't crazy enough, when we hit the highway the fog was insanely thick, what is usually a 35 minute drive home took over an hour. At times I was down to 40 km/hr (24 mi/hr) on a highway that has a limit of 100(60). The fog was freezing on the windshield, I had heat on full and had to keep spraying the window. Then right beside my place, someone missed the stop sign in the fog and got their wee car lodged up on a snow bank across the road. Once we were safely home I ate 1 ½ pieces of pizza and all 8 chicken wings :S. I got the kids tucked in bed, and realised I really really needed a drink (I don't drink very often) so had myself a JD's and coke and despite all the caffeine I slept like a baby LOL!

According to Health Status.com, I burned 2,239 calories approximately, I think that's conservative, between panic attacks with a missing child, stress shopping, and white knuckle drive home, I'm sure I burned more. But then I'm sure I consumed more than that too LOL.

Happy Fitting !! 8)

Calories Burned Estimation:

Results:
According to the information you provided, below is an estimate of the calories you burn. Generally, to maintain your weight, the amount of calories you take in should equal the amount you burn. The Daily Energy Expenditure calculator will help you figure out the minimum number of calories your body needs each day to work properly. To lose one U.S. pound (.454 kg), you must burn 3,500 more calories than you take in as food.

Activity

Calories burned

Sitting / resting

88

Standing

99

Housework

122

Driving

266

Shopping

499

Walking 2 mph

1,165

Total Calories Burned

2,239

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Remembrance Day 2009


On Monday, November 11th, 1918, the Allies and Germany signed an armistice agreement in Paris, France at 5:00 AM (Paris time). At 11:00 AM hostilities ceased and WWI was over. On November 6th, 1919, Sir George Foster, acting Prime Minister of Canada, rose in the House of Commons to read a message from King George V, addressing "all the peoples of the Empire":
Tuesday next, November 11th, is the first anniversary of the armistice which stayed the world-wide carnage of the four preceding years, and marked the victory of right and freedom. I believe that my people in every part of the Empire fervently wish to perpetuate the memory of that great deliverance and of those who laid down their lives to achieve it.

To afford an opportunity for the universal expression of this feeling it is my desire and hope that at the hour when the armistice came into force, the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month, there may be for the brief space of two minutes a complete suspension of all our normal activities. During that time, except in the rare cases where this might be impractical, all work, all sound and all locomotion should cease, so that in perfect stillness the thoughts of every one may be concentrated on reverent remembrance of the glorious dead.


We are 91 years since the end of the "War to end all wars", 20 years (plus two days) since the fall of the Berlin Wall. Lots to remember this year.

Remembrance Day has a lot of meaning for me. As a child it was an important part of our school activities. We drew or coloured pictures, we memorised, "In Flander's Fields", sometimes we had a field trip before the day at a war museum or special memorial, we had a service/assembly, and a moment of silence at 1100 hours. The assemblies continue at schools today, although there seems to be less emphasis to commemorate and teach about the importance of this day. It is now a general holiday in Alberta so we will take a moment of silence at home.

Today I will also take time to remember three special people from my life. My daddy, Andrew Ian McCann, who passed away on Easter Sunday 1996, My step-dad, Ivan Michael Zaitsoff, who passed away October 5th, 2008, and a beloved high school teacher, Phil McKay, who passed away yesterday of pancreatic cancer. Rest in peace, each of you have had a bigger impact on my life that you will ever know. To Mr. McKay's family I send my prayers and thoughts.



Green Day ~ 21 Guns

Songwriters: Armstrong, Billie Joe; Bowie, David; Pritchard, Michael; Wright, Frank E., Iii

Do you know what's worth fighting for?
When it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away
And you feel yourself suffocating?

Does the pain weigh out the pride?
And you look for a place to hide?
Did someone break your heart inside?
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I

When you're at the end of the road
And you lost all sense of control
And your thoughts have taken their toll
When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul

Your faith walks on broken glass
And the hangover doesn't pass
Nothing's ever built to last
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I

Did you try to live on your own
When you burned down the house and home?
Did you stand too close to the fire
Like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone?

When it's time to live and let die
And you can't get another try
Something inside this heart has died
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I